Here's a list of who American voters thought to be the 100 sexiest women in the world. There are a lot of names on the list that I don't recognise, and there's a lot of crap in there too. What do you think?
1. Angelina Jolie
2. Jennifer Garner
3. Paris Hilton
4. Charlize Theron
5. Halle Berry
6. Alyssa Milano
7. Teri Hatcher
8. Pamela Anderson
9. Scarlett Johansson
10. Lindsay Lohan
11. Keira Knightley
12. Salma Hayek
13. Cameron Diaz
14. Leeann Tweeden
15. Mariah Carey
16. Jessica Simpson
17. Beyoncé Knowles
18. Carmen Electra
19. Maria Sharapova
20. Jennifer Love Hewitt
21. Jessica Biel
22. Jessica Alba
23. Brooke Burke
24. Jenna Jameson
25. Heidi Klum
26. Vida Guerra
27. Christina Aguilera
28. Kristin Kreuk
29. Faith Hill
30. Gwen Stefani
31. Jennifer Lopez
32. The Olsen Twins
33. Shania Twain
34. Beth Ostrosky
35. Mandy Moore
36. Josie Maran
37. Janet Jackson
38. Eva Longoria
39. Adriana Lima
40. Reese Witherspoon
41. Jennifer Aniston
42. Jamie-Lynn DiScala
43. Tara Reid
44. Maggie Grace
45. Elizabeth Hurley
46. Eliza Dushku
47. Kate Hudson
48. Anna Benson
49. Natalie Portman
50. LeAnn Rimes
51. Penelope Cruz
52. Mischa Barton
53. Eva Mendes
54. Jenny McCarthy
55. Katherine Heigl
56. Lucy Liu
57. Jennie Finch
58. Maggie Gyllenhaal
59. Amanda Righetti
60. Kate Bosworth
61. Estella Warren
62. Anna Kournikova
63. Landi Swanepoel
64. Sarah Michelle Gellar
65. Gisele Bundchen
66. Neve Campbell
67. Uma Thurman
68. Catherine Zeta-Jones
69. Nicole Kidman
70. Emma Bunton
71. Kate Beckinsale
72. Katie Holmes
73. Morgan Webb
74. Heather Graham
75. Evangeline Lilly
76. Shakira
77. Rachel Bilson
78. Kaley Cuoco
79. Amanda Beard
80. Sofia Vergara
81. Ashanti
82. Denise Richards
83. Molly Sims
84. Alessandra Ambrosio
85. Kelly Ripa
86. Mayra Veronica
87. Jamie Pressley
88. Jennifer Connelly
89. Monica Bellucci
90. Kristi Leskinen
91. Logan Tom
92. Kelly Clarkson
93. Jennifer Hanson
94. Courtney Hansen
95. Alicia Keys
96. Brande Roderick
97. Natalie Gulbis
98. Milla Jovovich
99. Rebecca Romijn
100. Roselyn Sanchez
Saturday, April 30, 2005
Friday, April 29, 2005
Super Size Me
Super Size Me was shown on TV here last night. I don't know what the guy was complaining about. It could have been a lot worse, just look what happened to this girl.......
Something silly
I've just realised that there's been nothing but celebrity photos on my blog for a while now, so I better post something silly. Whoever came up with this name just wasn't thinking straight!!
Milla Jovovich 3
Of course we all know Milla Jovovich as Leeloo in The Fifth Element. I once saw an interview with Milla, she came across as being a little bonkers, but that doesn't show when she's acting, I think she's great, and beautiful too.
Milla Jovovich 2
Milla Jovovich is like a chameleon, always changing. I have so many pictures of her and in each one she looks totally different, sometimes unrecognisable.
Smart Women
Barbara Walters of 20/20 (USA-ABC Television) did a story on gende rroles in Kabul, Afghanistan, several years before the Afghan conflict. She noted that women customarily walked 5 paces behind their husbands. She recently returned to Kabul and observed that women still walk behind their husbands. From Ms Walters vantage point, despite the overthrow of the oppressive Taliban regime, the women now seem to walk even further back behind their husbands and are happy to maintain the old custom. Ms Walters approached one of the Afghani women and asked,
"Why do you now seem happy with the old custom that you once tried so desperately to change?"
The woman looked Ms Walters straight in the eyes, and without hesitation said,
"Land mines."
MORAL OF THE STORY: BEHIND EVERY MAN IS A SMART WOMAN!!
"Why do you now seem happy with the old custom that you once tried so desperately to change?"
The woman looked Ms Walters straight in the eyes, and without hesitation said,
"Land mines."
MORAL OF THE STORY: BEHIND EVERY MAN IS A SMART WOMAN!!
Thursday, April 28, 2005
Blade Trinity
Jay.Mac has a great review of Blade Trinity. Here's a pic of Wesley Snipes baring flesh for any adoring fans like myself.
Rachel Bilson 1
Meet Rachel Bilson, better known to some as Summer from The O.C. Doesn't she look so sweet and wholesome like butter wouldn't melt in her mouth?
Rachel Bilson 2
Rachel Bilson wrapped in expensive fur and jewels, tries to look sexy but ends up looking like a cheap tramp. She should realise that you can still be captivating with a clean cut image.
Wednesday, April 27, 2005
Birds and Bees
A father asked his 10-year-old son if he knew about the birds and the bees.
"I don't want to know!" the child said, bursting into tears. "Promise me you won't tell me!"
Confused, the father asked what was wrong.
The boy sobbed, "When I was six, I got the "There's no Santa" speech.
At seven, I got the "There's no Easter Bunny" speech.
When I was eight, you hit me with the "There's no tooth fairy" speech.
If you're going to tell me that grownups don't really get laid, I'll have nothing left to live for!"
"I don't want to know!" the child said, bursting into tears. "Promise me you won't tell me!"
Confused, the father asked what was wrong.
The boy sobbed, "When I was six, I got the "There's no Santa" speech.
At seven, I got the "There's no Easter Bunny" speech.
When I was eight, you hit me with the "There's no tooth fairy" speech.
If you're going to tell me that grownups don't really get laid, I'll have nothing left to live for!"
Tuesday, April 26, 2005
Joke
A guy enters a bar carrying an alligator. Says to the patrons,
"Here’s a deal. I'll open this alligator's mouth and place my genitals inside. The gator will close his mouth for one minute, then open it, and I'll remove my unit unscathed. If it works, everyone buys me drinks."
The crowd agrees. The guy drops his pants and puts his privates in the gator's mouth. Gator closes mouth. After a minute, the guy grabs a beer bottle and bangs the gator on the top of its head. The gator opens wide, and he removes his genitals unscathed. Everyone buys him drinks. Then he says:
"I'll pay anyone $100 who's willing to give it a try."
After a while, a hand goes up in the back of the bar. It's a woman.
"I'll give it a try," she says, "but you have to promise not to hit me on the head with the beer bottle."
"Here’s a deal. I'll open this alligator's mouth and place my genitals inside. The gator will close his mouth for one minute, then open it, and I'll remove my unit unscathed. If it works, everyone buys me drinks."
The crowd agrees. The guy drops his pants and puts his privates in the gator's mouth. Gator closes mouth. After a minute, the guy grabs a beer bottle and bangs the gator on the top of its head. The gator opens wide, and he removes his genitals unscathed. Everyone buys him drinks. Then he says:
"I'll pay anyone $100 who's willing to give it a try."
After a while, a hand goes up in the back of the bar. It's a woman.
"I'll give it a try," she says, "but you have to promise not to hit me on the head with the beer bottle."
Monday, April 25, 2005
Sunday, April 24, 2005
Cryptic Fiction
Keep an eye on this blog. My lovely fiance fancies himself as a writter and speaking from experience, his stuff is pretty amazing. He's going to post some of his works and wants some feedback. It promises to be a great read!
Friday, April 22, 2005
Getting Married
I was happy. My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. My parents helped us in every way, my friends encouraged me, and my girlfriend? She was a dream!
There was only one thing bothering me, very much indeed, and that one thing was her younger sister. My prospective sister-in-law was twenty years of age, wore tight mini skirts and low cut blouses. She would regularly bend down when quite near me and I got many a pleasant view of her underwear. It had to be deliberate. She never did it when she was near anyone else.
One day little sister called and asked me to come over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived. She whispered to me that soon I was to be married, and she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't overcome and didn't really want to overcome. She told me that she wanted to make love to me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister. I was in total shock and couldn't say a word. She said,
"I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want to go ahead with it just come up and get me."
I was stunned. I was frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. When she reached the top she pulled down her panties and threw them down the stairs at me. I stood there for a moment, then turned and went straight to the front door. I opened the door and stepped out of the house. I walked straight towards my car. My future father-in-law was standing outside. With tears in his eyes he hugged me and said,
"We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn't ask for better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family."
The moral of this story is: Always keep your condoms in your car.
There was only one thing bothering me, very much indeed, and that one thing was her younger sister. My prospective sister-in-law was twenty years of age, wore tight mini skirts and low cut blouses. She would regularly bend down when quite near me and I got many a pleasant view of her underwear. It had to be deliberate. She never did it when she was near anyone else.
One day little sister called and asked me to come over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived. She whispered to me that soon I was to be married, and she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't overcome and didn't really want to overcome. She told me that she wanted to make love to me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister. I was in total shock and couldn't say a word. She said,
"I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want to go ahead with it just come up and get me."
I was stunned. I was frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. When she reached the top she pulled down her panties and threw them down the stairs at me. I stood there for a moment, then turned and went straight to the front door. I opened the door and stepped out of the house. I walked straight towards my car. My future father-in-law was standing outside. With tears in his eyes he hugged me and said,
"We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn't ask for better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family."
The moral of this story is: Always keep your condoms in your car.
Bodyscapes
Go visit bodyscapes. This guy is amazing. He photographs naked men and women, using their bodies as landscapes for little figures. It's fun!
Wednesday, April 20, 2005
Breaststroke
A blonde, a brunette and a redhead had a breaststroke swimming race across the
''I don't want to be a tattletale or anything, but the other two used their arms.''
Tuesday, April 19, 2005
Little Johnny
Little Johnny watched his daddy's car pass by the school playground and go into the woods. Curious, he followed the car and saw Daddy and Aunt Jane in a passionate embrace. Little Johnny found this so exciting that he could not contain himself as he ran home and started to tell his mother,
"Mummy, I was at the playground and I saw Daddy's car go into the woods with Aunt Jane. I went back to look and he was giving Aunt Jane a big kiss, then he helped her take off her shirt. Then Aunt Jane helped Daddy take his pants off, then Aunt Jane........"
At this point Mummy cut him off and said,
"Johnny, this is such an interesting story, suppose you save the rest of it for supper time. I want to see the look on Daddy's face when you tell it tonight."
At the dinner table, Mummy asked little Johnny to tell his story. Johnny started his story,
"I was at the playground and I saw Daddy's car go into the woods with Aunt Jane. I went back to look and he was giving Aunt Jane a big kiss, then he helped her take off her shirt. Then Aunt Jane helped Daddy take his pants off, then Aunt Jane and Daddy started doing the same thing that Mummy and Uncle Bill used to do when Daddy was in the Army."
Moral: Sometimes you need to listen to the whole story before you interrupt.
"Mummy, I was at the playground and I saw Daddy's car go into the woods with Aunt Jane. I went back to look and he was giving Aunt Jane a big kiss, then he helped her take off her shirt. Then Aunt Jane helped Daddy take his pants off, then Aunt Jane........"
At this point Mummy cut him off and said,
"Johnny, this is such an interesting story, suppose you save the rest of it for supper time. I want to see the look on Daddy's face when you tell it tonight."
At the dinner table, Mummy asked little Johnny to tell his story. Johnny started his story,
"I was at the playground and I saw Daddy's car go into the woods with Aunt Jane. I went back to look and he was giving Aunt Jane a big kiss, then he helped her take off her shirt. Then Aunt Jane helped Daddy take his pants off, then Aunt Jane and Daddy started doing the same thing that Mummy and Uncle Bill used to do when Daddy was in the Army."
Moral: Sometimes you need to listen to the whole story before you interrupt.
Sunday Morning Sex
Upon hearing that her elderly grandfather had just passed away, Katie went straight to her gandparent's house to visit her 95 year old grandmother and comfort her.
When she asked how her grandfather had died, her grandmother replied,
"He had a heart attack while we were making love on Sunday morning."
Horrfied, Katie told her grandmother that two people nearly 100 years old having sex would surely be asking for trouble.
"Oh no, my dear," replied granny. "Many years ago, realizing our advanced age, we figured out the best time to do it was when the church bells would start to ring. It was just the right rhythm. Nice and slow and even. Nothing too strenuous, simply in on the Ding and out on the Dong." She paused to wipe away a tear, and continued, "he'd still be alive if the ice cream truck hadn't come along."
When she asked how her grandfather had died, her grandmother replied,
"He had a heart attack while we were making love on Sunday morning."
Horrfied, Katie told her grandmother that two people nearly 100 years old having sex would surely be asking for trouble.
"Oh no, my dear," replied granny. "Many years ago, realizing our advanced age, we figured out the best time to do it was when the church bells would start to ring. It was just the right rhythm. Nice and slow and even. Nothing too strenuous, simply in on the Ding and out on the Dong." She paused to wipe away a tear, and continued, "he'd still be alive if the ice cream truck hadn't come along."
Monday, April 18, 2005
Matilda
This is Matilda, she turns one next month. This photo is a couple of months old, she's changed a lot since it was taken.
George
Not much to blog about, so I thought I would post a couple of pics of my daughters. This is George, she'll be turning three soon, I took this photo of her a few weeks back when we went to the Lake District in England for a weekend. Isn't she adorable?!
Sunday, April 17, 2005
Ever Wonder
...why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
...why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?
...why you don't ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
...why "abbreviated" is such a long word?
...why doctors call what they do "practice"?
...why you have to click on "Start" to stop Windows?
...why lemon juice is made with artificial flavor, while dishwashing liquid is made with real lemons?
...why the man who invests all your money is called a broker?
...why there isn't mouse-flavored cat food?
...who tastes dog food when it has a "new & improved" flavor?
...why Noah didn't swat those two mosquitoes?
...why they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
...why they don't make the whole plane out of the material used for the indestructible black box?
...why sheep don't shrink when it rains?
....why they are called apartments when they are all stuck together?
...if con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
...why they call the airport "the terminal" if flying is so safe?
...why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?
...why you don't ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
...why "abbreviated" is such a long word?
...why doctors call what they do "practice"?
...why you have to click on "Start" to stop Windows?
...why lemon juice is made with artificial flavor, while dishwashing liquid is made with real lemons?
...why the man who invests all your money is called a broker?
...why there isn't mouse-flavored cat food?
...who tastes dog food when it has a "new & improved" flavor?
...why Noah didn't swat those two mosquitoes?
...why they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
...why they don't make the whole plane out of the material used for the indestructible black box?
...why sheep don't shrink when it rains?
....why they are called apartments when they are all stuck together?
...if con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
...why they call the airport "the terminal" if flying is so safe?
White Tiger
I must admit I have a thing for white tigers. I just want to reach out and cuddle it! I'll have to find some pics of Tions and Ligers to add here too.
Friday, April 15, 2005
Aer Lingus has the Answer . . .
A mother and her son were flying Aer Lingus from Dublin to Heathrow.
The son (who had been looking out the window) turned to his mother and asked,
"If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?”
The mother (who couldn't think of an answer) told her son to ask the stewardess.
So the boy asked the stewardess,
"If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?"
The stewardess responded, "Did your mother tell you to ask me?"
The boy said, "Yes she did."
"Well, then, tell your mother that there are no baby planes because Aer Lingus always pulls out on time. Have your mother explain that to you."
The son (who had been looking out the window) turned to his mother and asked,
"If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?”
The mother (who couldn't think of an answer) told her son to ask the stewardess.
So the boy asked the stewardess,
"If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?"
The stewardess responded, "Did your mother tell you to ask me?"
The boy said, "Yes she did."
"Well, then, tell your mother that there are no baby planes because Aer Lingus always pulls out on time. Have your mother explain that to you."
Thursday, April 14, 2005
Calorie Counter
Jay.mac at Cryptic Subterranean has a post on this calorie counter I found on washingtonpost.com. It's scary to think how many calories you are consuming in one meal. Recommended daily calorie intake is 2000 calories for women and 2500 calories for men. You can choose from Burger King, KFC, McDonalds, Subway, Taco Bell or Wendy's. Pick what you normaly eat when you're there and it tells you how many calories there are in that meal.
Be prepared to be shocked!
Be prepared to be shocked!
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